Alcohol Affected Stages at Singles Bars

As a Fairy Blogmother, I see it as my duty to sometimes offer some provocative thoughts which a less discerning reader might regard as advice. But I take my job seriously and it’s both some thought provoking questions and advice I need to offer today. Indulge me, if I remember correctly from my own youth, it is sometimes easier to listen to someone who isn’t your parent, but has traveled ‘the route’ already.

Recent news stories have saddened me, and I feel I must speak out about the dangers of alcohol taken in excess. I know, you’ve heard it before from parents, teachers, counselors, in print, by ear and on film, blah, blah, blah. But listen one more time, please. I won’t be repeating what you’ve heard untold times before, I hope. And for the record, I’m not a teetotaler. Even now I can tell you that a 5 oz glass of wine will cost you 3 Weight Watcher points.

I’ll ask the questions, you make the call. Did the disappearance of recent high school grad, Natalee Holloway and recent newly-wed, George Smith IV shock you a bit?

Was it the excess alcohol use that led to the tragic disappearance of these two young people on the threshold of a wonderfully exciting life?

Where were their friends and spouse? Might they, too have been in a similar state of self-induced stupor, too impaired to help? Are their companions victims as well--- forever feeling survivors’ guilt? Do these questions repeat in their minds as if they were an internal memory CD stuck in the same place? “If only I had…..” “It might have been me….” and similar thoughts surface as perpetual nightmares?

Excess intake of alcohol does more than add empty calories, weight gain, accidents, and possible alcoholic poisoning. It makes you a target of any predator looking for an easy mark. And that would be YOU if you drink to excess.

I have composed for you a progression of behaviors many drinkers experience on the barstool while sipping their ‘Mudslides” and “Bud’s”. Read through them, and see if you have found yourself at any of these steps on the continuum.

Mellow
Light-headed
Chatty
Ebullient
Footloose / fancy free
Silly
All- knowing
Posturing as a sultry vixen (Females most often)
Swaggering as if in testosterone overload (Males most likely)
Slurring speech
Sloppy gait
Sullen
Dizzy
Booting (ugh!)
Wipe out
Neverland


And now for the advice… Along with a designated driver for your drinking nights, get yourself a “designated independent non- drinking assessor,” or in the modern parlance, a DINDA.

Your DINDA should be an honest person with a strong arm. It is he or she who will assess your behavior and tell you when you must call it a night. And hopefully his/her judgment is as sound as your friendship and said person will not allow you to pass below the first stage on the above list. Or if nothing else the DINDA will be there to be aware and to keep a sober eye out for dangerous situations and people.

With your DINDA in place, if you have to ask: “What did I do last night?” you won’t have to say it with as much trepidation. Or go to Plan B: Don’t drink at all.